Skills Testing: High Difficulty Level

It was difficult using skills today.  I started off with a high degree of pain from both the fibromyalgia and the stress.  I had a moderately bad headache from the many knots in my neck and upper back.  I did manage to remember to breathe (Breathe) in 2 out 6.  It immediately helped calm my adult version of a temper tantrum.  Dad helped too.  His encouragement and listening made a big difference.  Coffee helped my headache as well.

I am proud to say that I recognized that today would be draining so I made sure to provide fuel to my body and mind in terms of food (PLEASE – Eat). 

Today, I went to visit my maternal grandmother.  I love her very much and she reminds me of how much I miss my mother, her daughter.  Halloween is especially difficult as Grandma, Pop-Pop, Mom, my twin sister and I always went trick-or-treating together.  It’s one of the memories that I’ll most likely have for a lifetime.  Pop-Pop’s gone too.  He passed away six months after my mother.

Luckily, my therapist was able to return my call and help me cope with my latest challenge (IMPROVE-Encouragement). Thanks so much, Dr. H.   I repeated three things that she told me as best as I remember.

1.                Today is a different day

read: the past doesn’t have to be repeated and be totally in the present moment (One-in-the-Moment)

2.                I don’t have to go down that path

read: I don’t have to make decisions before I even face them, and I can prevent a self-fulfilling prophecy

3.                Stay out of my own head

read: I can get lost in my own thoughts and stay fully focused of what I am doing exactly that minute (Awareness) and do something that distracts me (Distraction)

4.                I don’t have to stay if I don’t want to

read:  I can leave at anytime and go for a walk

             

By doing all the above, I was able to fully focus on Grandma while taking care of myself (Effectiveness & Participate). I was able to pray and ask my Mom and God for help (IMPROVE – Prayer). 

I also gave myself permission to leave when I wanted without guilt.  This was a first.  And Grandma does always try to lay guilt on, not to hurt me but to protect herself. 

I also incorporated a little self-soothe (Self Soothe the Five Senses) by using white tea therapy body lotion on Grandma’s hands while doing her nails (Build positive experiences).

I usually experience narcoleptic symptoms after visiting Grandma because narcolepsy is triggered by strong emotions and I love and worry about Grandma very, very much.  So, I am writing now (Describe) and promise that I will listen to Belleruth Naparstek’s Guided Imagery for Fibromyalgia (IMPROVE – Imagery) as I fall to sleep.